Thursday, January 20, 2005

Friend committed suicide

I know the title sounds dark. I too can't believe it when i heard on Tuesday that a friend of mine committed suicide. I'm not sure if it was in the papers, at least i didn't saw any.

This friend of mine was my classmate last year. He was pretty quiet. During the whole year, i barely had more than 10 words with him, and that was doing business. You know, i was the class monitor of 3C last year. I always had to walk around, talk to people, collect money and stuff. My impression about him was of course, that he was undoubtedly the introvert kind. He was never the one who brought much attention to himself. Most people doesn't even notice him.

Tuesday morning, when another classmate broke the news to me, it took me some time to digest. I mean, this suicide stuff, i never thought it would happen around myself. It's like those stuff only happen in newspapers and TVs.

Rumors was that he committed suicide because he can't get into 4S3. You see, When school re-opens, he was put into 4S4. He was the only 3C member who got into 4S4. You can imagine how lonely that would be. He appealed to get into 4S3, where most of his best friends are, but the school didn't approve that. It may seem a fairly small matter to you, but he was never a sociable person. Without his best friends, he got seriously upset.

But that can't be the sole reason, can it?

Then i found out the main reason was his family. Apparently, his father had another woman. His mother and father had quarreled over it. There were like considerations of separating and filing a divorce. I dunno if there had been fights, but it obviously was too much to bear for a 16-year-old.

Sometime around Saturday or Sunday, this friend of mine finally decided to end his life by hanging himself at the bathroom in his house.

Some people may call it stupid to waste a life like that, but to think when you're having problems in your life and doesn't have anyone to confide in. 16 isn't really mature, you know.

As for me, suicide just isn't my thing. My mom and dad have literally been quarrelling over small matters since like, forever. Sometimes when things got too damn bitch, there were mentions of divorcing. Like what mom said, no divorce was made when i was just a baby 'cause mom wanted me to have a normal family. Did i get upset over all the quarrelling? 'Course not! I mean, i was still a little kid when mom asked me who will i choose to be with-mom or dad- if there was a divorce.

I can handle it when i was just a little kid, so can i now. The suicide thing is 100% not going to happen to me, regardless how things may turn out in the future. I
always find a way to look at things from a different perspective. Everything has it's good side, know what i mean?

Anyway, i'm going to pay respect to my friend this coming Sunday. Some of my friends are going too, as will our last year's 3C form teacher. After all, he
did spent a whole year's time in the same class as me.